Life – it’s a lonely place. It’s hard to find people to resonate with and it gets harder every year.
First, we were surrounded by people, but after a while those people dropped out of our lives and we got surrounded by other people with whom we don’t resonate at all.
Some folks go abroad, with some you don’t want to be friends with.
And here you go – you’re left alone. None of the folks are your friends.
Life is a lonely journey – indeed.
As I sit in my small room. I think about the friends I had. Most of them were scumbags. Mostly arrogant and ignorant people. Pretty much dumb all the time.
It’s said that it’s better to be alone than to be with low quality people. And believe me – there are tons of low quality people who are not your friends. That’s lucky.
If you knew life was such a horrible place – would you wanted to be born? It’s not the horror that scares me, but there’s so much people – who have nothing similar with you.
You’re here alone. It’s good, that those people aren’t your enemies, because it would be even harder.
People who are alone, are never lucky because they don’t have people who support them. If you’re alone – you’re going to die alone.
In your 30s you’ve seen the best of life. Now it’s going to get worse and worse each year. Life has a tendency to get harder each year. It’s similar to video games – where you level up and things get harder.
I don’t know how you’re doing, but I’m getting a tough time these days.
The health isn’t as it used to be. And people aren’t as they used to be. And I’m not as I used to be. Things change. And you have to change with those things – otherwise you’re going to be alone on this fucking journey.
When you’re little, you are happy because you don’t understand many things. And when you get older – you start to understand things as they are. The planet – it’s hostile towards human life.
It’s said that a human has to push a rock uphill. And you reach the top when you’re dead. I guess death will be a relieve. But if not – fuck this life. It’s a miserable life I’m living.
My life – I didn’t imagined in my dreams that it would be this way. But I had expectations and it’s better to drop your expectations towards people, towards money, towards women, towards this planet. Living without expectations is better.
But how do you drop your expectations? We all desire things, we want things and some of us have the motivation to change the life and the world, but personally me – I don’t want to change anything in myself. I would rather change the world. Because this world doesn’t suit me.
I’m just glad I’m born now – not hundred years earlier when life was tougher. I can’t bare with it. Life is a struggle even these days. You gotta think where to get your food from. Many utopists failed to create modern life and the world. They tried, but you can’t control all the people. Many people don’t believe you can change the world. I don’t believe it too.
It is as it is – one person can’t do anything about that. I would be glad if capitalism would end. Because now – it’s everyone for himself. But I guess it always was that way. I’m just 31 year into the game and I’m already bored. I don’t imagine what will be during next upcoming years. I guess I will die unfulfilled.